The last few hours had been a living hell for Abbie, as she grappled
with the concept that she was waiting for a friend to die. That was
all she could think about. Olivia was going to die. It didn't matter
that she had a chance of pulling through, that she could fully
recover with little to no permanent side effects. She obsessed with
the fact that it had been close to five hours since their initial
injuries were inflicted and that no word had come from the doctor's
attending the Detective. She could not get the thought of Olivia's
life ending out of her mind. She's dying. She's dead and no one
wants to tell you. She's going to DIE. These words permeated her
thoughts, echoing from the back of her mind, chasing away any chance
she had of maintaining some semblance of normality. Her face hurt.
Her head hurt. Her heart hurt. She couldn't concentrate. She
couldn't sit still. Her right leg had started to shake up and down,
irritating the man sitting next to her.
"Abbie."
Elliot placed his hand on her jumping knee, the gesture halting her
movements. He didn't remove his hand immediately, leaving it cupped
on her kneecap, until he saw a woman enter the waiting room, then it
slowly fell away. Abbie looked at the woman as well, not recognizing
her at first, but turned to see Elliot's reaction. His mouth was
open as if he was going to speak, but then he snapped it shut, the
muscles in his jaw tensing and his eyes turned the color of cold
steel. She looked back to the woman, who had managed to flag down a
passing intern, and tried to recall where she had seen her before.
She was obviously here because of Olivia, Elliot's reaction
confirmed that, but who was she and why did he instantly turn to
stone when he saw her? When the woman finished talking with the
intern, she turned towards the pair and began to walk over. From
this position, Abbie could see the woman's feature more clearly and
then it hit her. She knew where she had seen this woman before. She
strode up to them both; her hands bundled into fist and stood over
Elliot.
"Elliot, what the fuck did you do to my girlfriend?"
*Olivia's girlfriend.*
It felt as though Abbie's heart had plummeted into her stomach and
the acid was eating away all the hope she had left. Olivia had not
mentioned a girlfriend during dinner. If anything, she had made it
quite clear that she was available and that she was interested in
picking things up from where they had left off.
*That was years ago. And things haven't changed. She STILL has a
girlfriend.*
She tried to ignore the scene that was playing before her. Elliot
was on his feet, red from the neck up, trying not to explode while
the girlfriend I think her name was Tristan, was spewing forth
obscenities and accusations. She was finally pushed over the edge
when she heard Tristan remark that she had always known that Elliot -
actually I think she referred to him as "hetro monkey"- was going
to get Olivia killed. Abbie shot to her feet and let loose a barrage
of pent up frustrations.
"That's enough! Elliot has NOTHING to do with Olivia's condition. If
you need someone to blame then blame me. She was with me when this
happened and I'd hate to think what could have happened to me had
she not been there. This is hard on everyone. Don't for a minute
think that Elliot or myself are not hurting."
Abbie was panting, trying to hold back the anger she was feeling not
only for this woman, but also for the situation that had occurred
for them to be here.
"And who the hell are you?"
"Abbie Carmichael. I'm a friend of Olivia's from a few years?"
"Oh?you! I know who you are. You're the little piece of ass she
fucked a few years ago. I know all about you, honey, so don't go
getting your hopes up. I'm still the one she comes home to."
Elliot was livid. He grabbed her arm and pulled her away towards the
ER doors talking through clenched teeth, speaking so softly that no
one other than Tristan could hear. Abbie was dumb struck. She
couldn't believe that Olivia would have told her partner about her
infidelities. And to have this monstrous woman making remarks about
it, in front of Elliot was absolutely mortifying. She grabbed the
gym bag sitting near the foot of her chair, rose and started to walk
away.
"Hey Abbie. Don't go."
Elliot was striding over to her, his color a little less crimson,
but not altogether normal. His face was nothing but remorseful.
"She's a nasty piece of work. What Olivia ever saw in her, I have NO
idea."
Abbie sat a few seats away from where she had previously while
Elliot took her hand in his.
"Look. Don't be embarrassed, OK? Olivia told me about what went down
with you guys and?"
Abbie's eyes flew up while a heavy blush rose from her neck. The
muscles in her jaw flexed, giving her a severe look.
"Did she broadcast it to everyone!" She looked down at her feet as
she continued. "This is exactly what I didn't want to happen.One moment
of weakness and this?" She lifted the hand that was not held by Elliot
into the air and let it flop back down with a resounding thump.
"Abbie, for Christ sakes. Olivia left Tristan shortly after you went
back to D.C. She told me because, well, I'm her family now. I know
about her...preferences and I don't really give a shit as long as she's happy
and she was happy with you. She didn't want to say anything to you
because of your job and D.C. and everything?" He let the sentence
drift off while he stroked her thumb.
"Oh...But what about...just then...she called her...her girlfriend."
"She's messed up. She's been harping on 'Liv for ages. I think they
see each other occasionally, but I'd say that's because Tristan's
familiar. Someone that can ...you know...comfort her when she's lonely..."
Elliot noticed the stony look that was seeping back onto Abbie's
face before hastily adding "But that hasn't happened for months. Six
or more."
"I wanna be alone for a bit. I'm gonna go get another drink. I'll
bring you back a cup."
Without waiting for a reply, she got to her feet and strode away,
not bothering to search out Tristan. She walked around the corner,
down the aisle to the cafeteria but noticed a smaller waiting room,
partially hidden by a forest of indoor shrubbery. She poked her head
inside, noticed that it was empty and walked to a chair in the
corner. She plunked herself down and closed her eyes. Images of that
night flashed behind her closed lids and she found herself thinking
about it for the first time in ages.
It had been nearly six months after her move to the Justice
Department when she had received an invitation to Jack McCoy's
birthday party. She couldn't recall his age, but then she didn't
think it had been disclosed. She was excited about getting back into
the city since she found D.C. to be a terrible bore. The suburbs
were suburbs. The city was barely a few miles wide. She missed the
oppressive architecture of New York and the bustle of activity in
every inch of the city. She was also looking forward to seeing her
colleges again, especially a certain SVU Detective. She had left
things a little tenuous between Olivia and herself, due mainly to
her inability to state the obvious, which was declare her attraction
for the older woman. She had book a hotel for the weekend, driven up
in a rental and prepared herself for an evening of home truths. She
was determined to let Olivia know just what she thought of her.
Abbie placed her hand over her eyes, trying to shield them from the
harsh neon's, while she skipped to the moment, in her mind, when she
had finally gotten the courage to approach the Detective.
Abbie glided through the throng of partygoers, giving a gracious nod
of the head hear and a wide smile there until she had managed to
sidle up next to Olivia. The Detective turned her head and lent into
Abbie.
"Help. This guy is just about boring the pants off of me."
"Maybe I'll just let him continue to see where this goes." Abbie
chuckled.
"Don't be cruel."
She slipped her hand into the Detective's and smiled warmly at the
fresh-faced ADA who was trying his best to impress Olivia with his
tales of adventure on his last holiday to the Australian Outback.
"So we stayed on this Sheep Station just outside of a little town
called Nowhere."
"Terribly sorry to interrupt, Nigel, but I need Detective Benson for
just a moment." She flashed him a shit-eating grin before walking
away, with Olivia in tow.
"Thank Christ for small mercies."
Abbie did not respond. She merely grinned and cocked an eyebrow, but
continued to guide Olivia through the crown of people.
"Where we off to?"
"I want to talk to you for a moment. Out here." Abbie's smoky voice
held a hint of tension. She pulled Olivia gently through the crowd,
towards the fire door that led to the laneway behind the bar. With
little effort, the door was pushed open and first Abbie, then
Olivia, walked into the chill of the night air, their breaths
misting with each exhale. Abbie moved over to a small stack of
crates while Olivia looked down the length of the laneway, towards
the streetlights illuminating the main road. She stuck her hands in
the pockets of her leather jacket and stubbed the toe of her boot
against the asphalt. She looked at Abbie from the corner of her eye
and noticed her standing, arms folded, smirking in her direction. A
small smile played on Olivia's lips as she went back to looking at
her shoes.
"You're fascinating to watch, you know that?" Abbie drawled, her
accent apparent, along with a slight slur in her speech, associated
with one who had merrily consumed more than was good for her.
Olivia lifted her eyes, her head still facing the ground and raised
her eyebrows.
"You watch me?" This elicited a small chuckle from the attorney.
"You sound genuinely surprised. I thought you were a little more
observant than that, Detective."
Olivia tipped her head to the side as though she were contemplating
a thought then cocked her left eyebrow, straightened somewhat, and
removed her hands from the pockets of her coat. She let the tip of
her tongue sweep over the corner of her upper lip as she slowly
moved toward Abbie. She ran her hands through her hair, tucking the
loose strands behind her ear. I need to get a haircut. Maybe
something...shorter.
Abbie stood as she had before, her arms casually crossed, while the
corners of her lips turned up in another smirk that helped define
her dimples, a look she knew always got her what she wanted.
Neither woman spoke, the only sounds coming from the door leading
back into the bar and the occasional car horn blearing from the main
street.
"Oh?I'm observant." Olivia gave the attorney a predatory look. "For
instance, I've noticed that you've brought me out here." She waved
her hand around, indicating the dark laneway as she continued moving
closer to her target.
"Am I right in assuming that you want me? ". She let the question
sit a moment before continuing "for something?"
Abbie growled a guttural purr, the sound not quite reaching Olivia's
ears. She dropped her arms to her sides but her stance was still
more than inviting. As Olivia moved closer to her, she took a step
backwards, feeling the hard brick wall against her back. Olivia
moved so that there were just a few inches between them before
letting her eyes wander down Abbie's neckline. She licked her upper
lip again, making a slow, deliberate attempt to unsettle the other
woman. She could feel the soft tickle of Abbie's breath on her cheek
as the attorney let out a deep sigh, with a hint of a groan. Olivia
smirked at the sound before she turned to move away. Abbie brought
her hands up to the leather lapels of Olivia's jacket and took a
firm hold, stopping any kind of retreat from the Detective. Olivia
was stock still, her eyes boring into the younger woman's, her whole
body tense, but gradually, she relaxed and remained where she stood.
Abbie released the leather, smoothing the lapels down and gently
stroking the soft hide, before letting her hands rest on Olivia's
shoulders. Olivia moved in to Abbie, her body pushing against the
younger woman's, and stretched up to whisper in her ear.
"I hope you know what you're doing."
Abbie ran her hands down the leather coat, feeling the subtle ridges
that defined bone and muscle hidden beneath its surface while she
contemplated her answer. She had been angling for this for the
better part of the night but she needed to present it in a way that
didn't expose her vulnerability.
"Yes. Your right." Olivia pulled back and looked at Abbie, a little
confused.
"I do want you for something."
She lent in slowly and captured Olivia's top lip between her own and
gently kissed the soft flesh, running her tongue along the
underside. Olivia did not respond at first, leaving Abbie with the
impression she had made one of the biggest mistakes of her life but
after a moment, the kiss was deepened and Olivia moved her hand down
to the stocking clad leg of the Attorney.
"Oh God?" was gasped when Olivia took Abbie's earlobe into her
mouth, sucking gently and licking the sensitive flesh leading to her
neck, down along the hairline, to feast on the dip of her
collarbone, nuzzling between flesh and coat. Her fingers began a
lazy ascent along the outer thigh resting momentarily on the hem of
the suit skirt, before sliding under the material and pushing
upwards along the underside of Abbie's upper thigh stopping only
when it was discovered that the stocking ended. Olivia moan into
Abbie's neck when she felt the softness of skin instead of the rasp
of nylon.
"Geezuz Abbie."
Abbie's fingers wound themselves through Olivia's dark hair and
guided her face up to her own, where she took the Detective's mouth,
thrusting her tongue deep, her desire mounting as Olivia returned
the feverish kiss. Olivia's hand continued to move along the now
heated flesh of Abbie's upper thigh, sliding around behind to stroke
the curve of her ass. Abbie raised her leg and hooked her heel
around Olivia's calf, drawing the older woman in closer.
"Are you considering taking me here because I have to say, it's not
exactly how I would have imagined it." Abbie said as she felt
Olivia's fingers slide under the cotton of her panties to slowly
stroke her cheek.
"First you watch me and now you imagine me doing this with you? My,
we are full of surprises tonight aren't we?" Olivia's teased.
Abbie took a hold of the arm that was currently on her ass and
stopped its progress. She lowered her leg and gave Olivia one more
smoldering kiss before continuing.
"Don't tease."
She pulled her skirt down from where it had ridden up and smoothed
the material over her thighs while Olivia continued to nibble gently
on her neck. She took Olivia's face into her hands brought it up
level to her own, tucking the errant hair hanging over her eyes back
behind her ear.
"We should probably go back inside. I certainly don't want to be the
center of a scandal."
"Come home with me."
Olivia's look was intense, leaving Abbie somewhat breathless. She
wanted this. She knew that. The throbbing heat between her legs
would testify to the fact she was more than ready but she didn't
really want some casual dalliance, especially not with someone like
Olivia, a person she respected, admired and considered a friend.
"Do you really want to do that?" Abbie looked down at Olivia's shirt
and began to fidget with a button.
"God Abbie. All I wanna do is be inside of you."
Ten minutes later, the two women were standing in Olivia's bedroom,
stripping off clothing and tossing the garments carelessly on the
floor.
Abbie lay back against the soft, cotton sheets, letting the sheen of
sweat coating her naked body cool against the chill of the mid dawn
morning and letting her panting subside to mere gulpings for fresh
air. She smiled to herself as she rolled over to look at the older
woman lounging beside her, her head propped on her arm. She let her
eyes rake over the form of her new lover, each expanse of skin
rekindling the memory of their frenzied ...what? Lovemaking? No.
Coupling? Sounds like a Discovery Channel documentary. No. Fucking.
That's the word she would use to describe how she felt during, and
now, after their sex. She had been royally fucked. Even now, moments
after finishing, for what, the fourth time, she could feel the
delicious sting of pain associated with hard penetration and licking
and sucking and... she let out a small chuckle, which rousted Olivia
out of her post-orgasmic reverie.
"What are you giggling at?"
"I wouldn't call that a giggle. I don't giggle. I'll have you know
that that was a self-satisfied chuckle. No giggling here."
Olivia reached out and ran a finger down Abbie's arm, stopping when
she reached the splayed fingers resting against her hip.
"You?are amazing." She held Abbie's gaze while she lent over to
place a chaste kiss against her forehead, her eyelids, her temple
and then her cheek before gently kissing her swollen lips. Abbie
pulled away before the kiss was deepened, holding her hand up in
protest.
"If we start again so soon, I'm not gonna be able to sit for a
week." She smiled as she let her hand push back the hair that was
hanging over Olivia's face tucking it behind her ears.
"Can't keep up with me, eh?" Olivia took Abbie's hand into her own
and kissed the upturned palm.
"Oh...Its not that. I've definitely got staying power. Its just that I
haven't really been...active for a while and well...I think you well and
truly made up for that."
Olivia had begun to trace her finger softly over Abbie's exposed
stomach, drawing spirals and other assortments, not quite ready to
break contact with the young Attorney. Abbie relaxed into the touch,
occasionally sounding her pleasure with small groans and sighs. She
took the time to survey the bedroom, realizing she hadn't really
taken the time to look at anything other than Olivia when she had
first entered the apartment, hours before. The walls were painted
navy blue with what looked like off-white skirting boards. The
floors had an industrial look, the wood marked with paint and age,
with a polished finish, while the furnishings were made from sturdy
timbers, their colours distinct and suiting the overall look of the
room. She looked over at the tall boy and noticed a picture frame
sitting amongst perfume bottles and other personal knick-knacks. The
picture contain inside was of Olivia holding another woman, their
smiles wide and friendly, their embrace intimate. Abbie smiled as
she looked to the side table next to Olivia until she noticed
another picture. This time, the two women we kissing passionately,
oblivious to the photographer. The photo was striking, and Abbie
found herself getting lost in the intimacy of the scene.
"Is she an old lover?"
Olivia turned to look at the picture and froze, her hand stock still
against Abbie's belly. Abbie tensed when she got no reply, her mind
buzzing with reservations. She sat up right, dragging the sheet to
shield her nakedness before she continued.
"She's your girlfriend...!" Abbie's voice was tinged with disbelief.
Again, Olivia gave no verbal response, but her body language
screamed Abbie's suspicion. Without waiting for the excuses, Abbie
got out of bed, throwing the sheet onto Olivia. Olivia sprang out of
her side, not bothering to cover up.
"Abbie wait. Please!" Olivia tried to stop Abbie from leaving the
bedroom but Abbie had already retrieved her underwear from the floor
and easily pushed her way past Olivia into the living room,
shrugging off the Detective's attempt to grab her.
"Don't! Don't touch me!" Abbie picked up her suit from it's crumpled
pile and searched madly for her shirt and bra. After a few moments
of looking, she stopped still and threw her clothes back onto the
floor.
"I'm not going to be a 'piece on the side' for anyone! I have never
cheated on any of my partners, ever and I was hoping never to be
apart of something like...this! What the hell were you playing at?
What, because I'm down in D.C., you can fuck me without having to
deal with any consequences?"
Olivia stood in the doorway of her bedroom with her arms crossed,
leaning on the door jam, looking down at the floor, unaware of her
obvious nakedness. She looked up at Abbie, who was pulling up her
underwear while reaching for her shirt.
"I'm not gonna lie to you. That woman is my girlfriend but things
haven't been right for us for a while. It's no excuse, I know but
when I saw you tonight, I felt all of these incredibly intense
emotions. Feelings I'd almost forgotten were possible and then out
in the alleyway?" She let her sentence trail off as she moved closer
to Abbie. "You made me feel exciting, beautiful and unbelievably
sexy. I haven't had anyone make me feel that way for a long time."
Abbie was now fully dressed, sans bra and stockings, looking at
Olivia. She bit her bottom lip momentarily before she bent to put on
her heels. When she straightened, she ran her fingers through her
hair, combing out the tangles and looked for her leather bag.
"You took advantage of me. You must have known how much I wanted you
and God knows I still do but I am not going to be a part of this."
She waved her hand around to indicate the situation they now found
themselves in. After a few moments, she realized she wasn't going to
find her bag and stamped her foot on the floor, which echoed through
the quite apartment.
"Where the hell is my bag!"
Olivia quietly moved over to the sofa, picked up the bag and walked
over to where Abbie stood, dejected. She held it out for her and
flinched slightly when Abbie snatched it away from her. Abbie felt a
momentary pang of guilt at the way she was making Olivia feel but it
was quickly quashed with the anger from before.
"I'm sooo mad at you right now. I would never have come here had I
known." She rifled through her bag until she found the keys to both
her hotel room and rental car. As she prepared herself to leave she
looked over at Olivia who had seated herself on the sofa with her
head in her hands. She felt so confused. On one hand, she wanted to
storm out and never see the Detective again but on the other, she
wanted to take her into her arms and hold her, forgiving her for her
infidelity. She stood for a moment in the eerily quite apartment
before walking over to the front door and turning the knob.
"I'm sorry." Abbie stopped and looked back at Olivia who was looking
at her, her eyes pleading for her not to go but it was too late.
"So am I." With that, she opened the door, walked out and closed it
behind her.
